POV: You Find Cartoon Men More Attractive Than The Ones IRL😅

So I may or may not have a crush on Clark Kent from My Adventures With Superman… and yes I am aware he is straight (sigh).

Clark Kent from Warner Bros. Animation series, "My Adventures With Superman". Available to steam on Adult Swim.

I recently started watching Warner Bros. Animation's new DC animated TV show, My Adventures With Superman. I just had to come online to confess my undying love for this particular version of Clark Kent voiced by Jack Quaid. Quaid’s ‘golden retriever energy’ (akin to that of Kit Connor’s Nick Nelson from Netflix’s Heartstopper) and his adorably affectionate performance had me screaming, “Why not me, God?” in envy of Lois Lane in every episode. 

It’s the way Clark will nervously string his sentences together when he gets flustered by Lois’s beauty and personality, which happens nearly every five minutes of them interacting. And when he switches to his protective ‘Superman tone’ I can only fantasise about being wrapped inside his massive biceps.

Unfortunately, I am forced back into reality when I remember that he and Lois are essentially joined at the hip until the end of time. But a man can still dream. And dream I shall, given my current circumstances…. 

In a perfect world, I would be sitting comfortably in the arms of Superman as he lifts me off into the sunset. My head would be resting gently on his large chest, listening to his heartbeat and letting the rest of the world fall away. How is it that a fictional character can make you feel so safe? 

No man has ever made me feel that way. Not once. Maybe it’s not much of an attraction thing, but more so a survival thing. With cartoon men, there’s no risk. It’s all contained within an imagined reality where nothing bad can happen. Is that too much to ask?

Call me delusional, but for the moment, I’ll just carry on crushing on Clark. He’s the kind of man who’d run across town just to get me a drink from my favourite cafe. He’d argue with me when I’m being annoying and then forgive me two seconds later. He’d help me with my work when I ask and then he’d take me to dinner afterwards. 

And if anyone tried to hurt me, he’d beat the living daylight out of them. That’s the standard people, and nothing less will suffice.

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And that brings us to the end of this year's Valentine's season! Now there's only one thing left to do. If you’re single and delusional like me, go and watch My Adventures With Superman! I'm telling you, Clark is probably one of the most attractive cartoon men out there. Just remember, he's MINE.