Reassessing the infamous "Why Are You Gay?" meme that sparked laughter across the internet.
It's been a little over a decade since Ugandan LGBTQ+ activist Pepe Julian Onzeima was misgendered and disrespected on national TV. That is the context in which we should remember this moment in popular culture. Instead, it has become a 'harmless' joke people share with their friends on social media.
Because homophobia is funny, I guess?
When this interview occurred, Uganda's first 'Kill The Gays' bill was making its rounds through parliament. It looks like in the end, the anti-gay movement and the likes of Pastor Martin Ssempa got their way.
And you know what? It is a little bit funny, if not ironic, that we find ways to laugh away the oppression of an entire community instead of facing the glaring harsh realities head-on. It's 'funny' that in over 10 years the only thing that's changed is NBS's improved broadcasting quality.
But you know what the most hysterical bit is? While we were losing our breaths laughing at a cartoonish interview, oblivious to the rising anti-gay, hateful rhetoric imported from US conservative evangelicals, any hope of the Ugandan LGBTQ+ community and our issues being taken seriously was eviscerated.
The Humor in Homophobia
You know the saying "it's funny until it's you"? Well, queer people have always been the butt end of the joke it seems. Some of our first bullies are our family members. But if we're not bullied at home, then we're probably being bullied at school- especially if it's a conservative Christian school, like the one I attended in my childhood. My lack of athletic talent made me an easy target for some of the other boys. It didn't help that all my best friends were girls and I loved fairies and princesses.
What's genuinely funny is that I could've liked all those things and still turned out straight. Subverting stereotypes is one of the biggest tricks in every comedian's playbook. Once you've disarmed your audience's expectations by leading them to believe one thing, only for your punchline to be the exact opposite of what you implied, you've struck the funny bone (or at the very least left them surprised).
Another great way to make your audience laugh is to expose your ignorance on a topic. Of course, then they'll be laughing at you, instead of with you depending on how you deliver the joke. This is most likely the reason the "Why Are You Gay?" meme is funny for some.
They get to laugh at the interviewer as he confuses being transgender with being gay. For the audience members who also don't know the difference, they get a laugh out of seeing someone share in their confusion.
But upon deeper reflection, I don't think this is the only reason people find this meme funny. The 'African-ness' of it all is of major significance too. From the "local" accent ("local" having a double meaning of "from that region" and the negative connotation of "ghetto") to the "animated" nature of the pastor who bombards the interview later on, all the way to the bizarre order of events- all of these are things internet users often point to as being laughter-inducing when it comes to this meme.
Of course, there are also MANY stereotypes in conversation with one another including (but not limited to):
"Confused LGBTQ+ person"- a common stereotype for LGBTQ+ people is that we are mentally unwell or unstable and need rehabilitation. This negative stereotype is deeply homophobic and has influenced attitudes toward conversion therapy.
"African Pastor"- a common stereotype of African pastors as loud, eccentric, and overzealous.
"Traditional African"- this stereotype comes in many flavors, the most popular being that our traditions and our customs are ancient and impervious to change or progress. Another version of the stereotype paints Africans as "backward" and incapable of adapting to modern times.
Those are just a few of the stereotypes I notice every time I look at this meme. And you know what, this used to make me laugh so hard. But there is something truly sobering about recognizing the subtext behind the joke.
You see, knowing the psychological stress queer Africans go through in places where their identity is criminalized taught me a few things about the humor of homophobia. Becoming friends with working and middle-class trans people during my short stay in the United States, exposed me to the reality of what it's like to be trans in an overwhelmingly transphobic society. Most of the time your experiences are overlooked, and when people actually start paying you attention, they can't even get your damn pronouns right, as if it's rocket science or something...
Having read and watched true stories of gay and trans Arabs fleeing their home countries and everything they've ever known because of who they are, is enough to rip off the rose-colored glasses of a 'harmless' internet meme.
Homophobia is only funny when you're not the butt end of the joke. In the year 2024, I could go to jail for 'promoting homosexuality'. I don't have the luxury to laugh at a meme that trivializes my experiences.
In 2024, laughing at "Why Are You Gay?" is not funny and to be honest, it was never that funny to begin with.
Laughing in the Face of Homophobia
This post isn't me admonishing the general public for laughing at a stupid internet meme. Who am I to tell you what to do with your body?
Still, I think given the current situation concerning LGBTQ+ rights in Uganda and other parts of the African continent, I'm having a hard time laughing at the meme. As a fellow blogger, Vincent Desmond, points out in his Medium article, "My problem with the Why Are You Gay? Meme", laughing at the ridiculousness of toxic masculinity on display during the full interview is totally fine, except many don't see it from that perspective and even worse, some make the trans guy the butt of the joke.
I take it a step further and add that the meme also relies on negative stereotypes about Africans and LGBTQ+ people to be as funny as it is. And it works. Every. Damn. Time.
I think if we're going to be laughing at this meme or any other display of homophobia and transphobia in 2024, then it should be from a queer-centric point of view. What do I mean by that?
Well, when we amplify the voices of marginalized people in issues directly impacting them, we tend to see a rise in awareness and people changing their assumptions. It's what the African feminist writer, Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, talks about in her amazing TED talk on the dangers of a single story. I've quoted her before on my site and in various posts as well and I will do so again because the moment calls for it:
"Many stories matter. Stories have been used to dispossess and to malign. But stories can also be used to empower and to humanize. Stories can break the dignity of a people. But stories can also repair that broken dignity."
So what does this mean for queer-centric laughter towards homophobia? Well, think of it this way: no one understands the nuances of being gay better than a gay person. No one gets the inconsistencies of gender roles and the gender binary better than non-binary and gender-nonconforming people. So why not center their laughter and their humor in all things anti-homophobic?
We can laugh at homophobia when the time is appropriate, but let it start with us- LGBTQ+ people- first. We should be the writers of the joke and not the punchline. That's all I'm saying.
One LGBTQ+ creator, who I've highlighted in a previous post, is a perfect example of this. His YouTube handle is MacDoesIt and he has an entire series of video reactions to homophobic content as a gay Black man in America. His chaotic personality makes audiences laugh with glee (and sometimes second-hand embarrassment) and he is a perfect example of what it looks like to laugh in the face of homophobia and discrimination.
So I guess homophobia is funny after all. Go figure.
What are your thoughts on this topic? I'd love for you to share what you think in the comments down below. Let's start a conversation!
The best way to support SENTI-ENT is to subscribe to my monthly newsletter and share the posts you enjoy with your friends and family.
Thank you so much for reading!
1 Comment